The Umbrella Killer (A Story in Pictures)

Over the years I have amassed quite a collection of parasols. Some of them do double duty as umbrellas. Nearly all of them are damaged in some way.

My friend Rapunzel has long called me an umbrella killer, but that is not fair. All but one of these parasols are vintage, so no-one should be surprised if they have incurred damage over the long years.

My friend Rapunzel has long called me an umbrella killer, but that is not fair.

There is nothing wrong with this umbrella. It's pretty lightness means it can double as a parsol in summer.I own so many because I hate sunscreen. It is sticky and greasy and takes so long to apply. Of course I do employ it at the beach, but around town I prefer to protect my complexion with a parasol.

Also, parasols are quaint and pretty, and olde-worlde-y. And they are sensational. It used to amuse me when bogans, travelling into the city from the outer suburbs, would cleverly cry out from their car as they passed me, “It’s not raining!” However, parasols are becoming quite a common sight now, and no longer provoke such witticisms.

Once an African girl (with skin so dark you would not suppose she would have a problem with the sun) approached me in the street to admire my umbrella. She told me she had a skin problem that required she should carry a parasol, but she was too embarrassed to do so. I warmly encouraged her to carry one. Who cares what the hoi polloi think?

It’s about time I took my armful of broken parasols to an umbrella repairer however. 

Read more about vintage parasols here. 

A missing pompom does not preclude my using this parasol

A trio of paraplegics: I was devastated when a crazy tram driver caused me to smash the handle of this white umbrella; I lost my balance on his hurtling vehicle. It has a gorgeous black lace lining. Epoxy glue was not successful, and I do not know what type of plastic the handle is made from. The frill on the taupe umbrella has unravelled (and this should be easy to fix for a patient needlewoman, which I am not). The mauve umbrella lost its tassel, and has a new one attached temporarily by way of a knot.One of the seams has come undone on this leaf-printed umbrella in a zesty shade of burnt orange. I ought to be able to repair this!Nothing wrong with the battenburg lace parasol I bought in Queensland years ago, but I have never yet carried this unfortunate brown umbrella. I don't like the colour. It would be kind to call it caramel and chocolate, but really, it is a shade of baby-poo brown. Yuk.

Blondie

So my bangs were getting really long, and I was overdue for a visit to the hair salon… I kept my appointment and thought, you know what? I’m gonna bite the bullet. I’m gonna take the plunge. I’m gonna take a gamble… I’m gonna do what I never did before.

I went blonde.

I feel very Debbie Harry tonight.

April Fool!

Orange Punch

I’m singing in the leaves…

For the Dutch, orange is associated with the royal family, and is also their national colour. In Hinduism, orange – a deep shade like saffron – is a significant colour, regularly worn in religious ceremonies. And the Irish associate it with unionists, sporting it on their flag for this reason.

Not surprisingly, the colour is named after the fruit of the same name. The first recorded use of it was in 1512, in the court of King Henry VIII. Before that, it was referred to as yellow-red in the English-speaking world. The word was introduced from the French, by way of old Arabic and Persian. In 1839 ‘orange peel’ was first used to describe this exact shade of orange, and less than a hundred years later, in 1915, ‘burnt orange’ made its appearance.

For me, orange is autumn, with skies full of fallen, golden leaves. I own one particularly cosy wool bomber jacket in vivid orange, and it comes out of hiding with the first true cold snap late in the season.

I love burnt orange, but it’s a colour that is not often seen in clothing. When I’ve chanced across it in the past, I have snapped it up: here I wear a silk blouse by Veronica Maine, a silk skirt by Hannii, and orange patent peeptoes by Aldo. The orange umbrella is vintage, found on Etsy, and the fragile scarf sewn with olive, teal and violet ‘leaves’ I found years ago in the Olga Berg warehouse.

I’m still waiting for enough leaves to fall so I can kick up my heels!

(Don’t forget to check out additional images in the Out-takes & Extras gallery.)

A Little Red Bag

Over the weekend I spent some time playing with the iPhone app Lo-Mob. Quite different from Hipstamatic, it allows one to apply filters simulating different types of films, or contact prints made with 30s glass masters etc. I happened to be in the city on Sunday morning, and I snapped some photos to experiment with. The results reminded me of this photo out of my own family’s albums.

My parents, aunt and three older sisters are walking along Swanston St Bridge in Melbourne, on a bright morning in the very early 70s. My sister Star is prancing ahead of everyone else, jauntily swinging her bag. I remember her telling me how she liked to be off in the front, and how she particularly loved that little red bag.

What is it about red accessories? I remember having a red bag when I was little too. Perhaps that is why I still love red bags and shoes to this day – they fill me with such nostalgia. For my birthday this year a friend gave me a red patent vintage bag, and today I created my own nostalgic moment with it.

My oldest sister – whose birthday is close to mine – visited me today for a combined birthday lunch, over which we exchanged gifts, and then took a stroll around the Botanic Gardens.

I asked her to take a photo of my bag with my Hipstamatic. Afterwards I took the photo into Lo-Mob to give it a classic wide border. Serendipitously, I had forgotten to warn her to keep her fingers away from the lens – the result lends the photo even more authenticity!

That’s what I love about these retro camera apps: hardly anyone uses real film anymore, and often mistakes and unflattering photos are deleted. But sometimes it is the mistakes that are the real delights. 

What I Actually Wore #0047

Serial #: 0047
Date: 29/09/2010
Weather: 15° and hail
Time Allowed: 7 minutes

When I’m in a hurry to dress for work, I usually build my outfits with colour. So I had chosen this pale blue-green-grey A-line skirt, and it was a cold spring day: I quickly pulled out a black wool jumper with a shawl collar and tie on the side. A friend had given the jumper to me. The shawl collar didn’t suit her – it broadened her shoulders. I don’t suffer from that affliction so I have worn it many times. It does make me wear my hair in a bun though, as it all looks too fussy with my hair down.

I hauled on black stockings for warmth, and for some fun and colour I put on a new purple necklace of fabric flowers, and a pair of platform ankle boots to counteract the sweetness of the 50s style skirt. I was disgusted that it hailed as soon as I stepped out of the house – not the moment to be wearing suede boots!

Items:

Top: David Lawrence
Skirt: Veronica Maine
Necklace: Diva
Bracelet: eBay
Earrings: made by myself
Rings: Dittoday
Watch: Kenneth Cole
Boots: Zoe Wittner

I like the several tones of green here: the cool watery hue of the skirt contrasted with the warm celadon green of the book’s binding. (‘Helen with a High Hand’ by Arnold Bennett, 1910. I am not sure why my sister thought it was highly amusing to give me this book – I am not at all high-handed!)