The Ten Fashion Commandments of Miss Moses

AN INTRODUCTION

I have been writing this journal and imparting my sartorial and somewhat tongue-in-chic wisdom for some years now, and the time has come at last to publish my Fashion Manifesto.

Ordinarily I scorn rules and decrees set out by arbiters of fashion: ‘you must own a little black dress, you must own a classic Burberry trench’ etc (click here for my thoughts on these and other fashion diktats) because I am by nature contrary. When I was around eight years old, and my older sister Serena informed me that I was just contrary for the sake of it, my immediate and indignant response was, chin raised defiantly, “I am not!” After I learned the actual meaning of the word ‘contrary’, I had to somewhat ruefully admit I was indeed, although I prefer not to shoot myself in the foot too often – it plays havoc with one’s ability to wear pretty shoes.

While I very much enjoy perusing fashion magazines and websites, I don’t buy into all those declarations of ‘five key items you must own this season’ and the like (quite possibly because I can’t afford to buy some of the more expensive ones). I do enjoy reading the fashion articles too as much as I like looking at the pictures, and I like to be aware of the trends and what is available in stores. But as for shopping and actually committing to the latest looks, I prefer to make my own mind up and make purchases that befit my own life and personal style.

these are universal rules that apply to all …

However, there are a few things I’ve learned over the years, and while they are just a little tongue-in-cheek, these are universal rules that apply to all (except perhaps some native tribal peoplegroups somewhere that don’t go in for shoes). Here they are. Print them out, stick ’em on the front of your wardrobe door, memorise them or take them with you when you next go shopping. Whatever it takes. Thou shalt have style.

THE TEN FASHION COMMANDMENTS

1. Thou shalt know thy sartorial identity, understand thy figure and garb thyself accordingly
2. Thou mayest look sexy, but thou shalt always remain classy
3. Thou shalt have fun with accessories
4. Thou shalt not own any ugly or dowdy raiment
5. When in doubt, thou must throw it out
6. Thou shalt shop with the precision of a military campaigner
7. Thou shalt throw away worn out shoes when they art beyond redemption
8. Launder thy garments respectfully and they wilt serve thee long
9. Thou shalt not be afraid of colour, for life is short, and —
10. Thou shalt not wear all black all the time, for thou art not an Italian widow.

Each week I’ll take one of these tenets and discuss them in greater detail. The text will be accompanied by informative and instructional illustrations that will help and guide you along your stylish path to sartorial glory.

Amen.

What I Actually Wore #0083

Serial #: 0083
Date: 13/08/2012
Weather: 17°
Time Allowed: 6 minutes

The Day of the Pompom.

I decided, as I was wearing my new grey knit top with the pompoms today, to wear as many pompoms as possible. How many could I rustle up out of my wardrobe? I was willing to rise to the challenge …

Well, the skirt may not have pompoms attached to it, but it has giant spots that match nicely. Naturally I wore my 1940s pompom headband. The pompoms on it are almost the same size as the ones on the knit. My earrings, reminiscent of pompoms, are handmade by me with Indian beads that are themselves beaded with iridescent blue seed beads. I love those because they dangle so satisfyingly. There is a matching necklace, but this is one case where matching earrings and necklace really would be too much – plus the pompoms on the knit are in the way.

My pearl ring is big and round, and the shoes – although they are pompomless (you can’t have everything, I guess) – are a pretty spectacular cobalt blue suede and patent leather. Work ready.

Items:

Top: Sonia Rykiel
Skirt: Anthropologie
Earrings: hand made
Ring: Autore
Hat: vintage
Shoes: Mollini

On the Carousel

After writing the story about the carousel horse necklace, I remembered this series of photos of a family trip to the zoo. I think I must be under five, judging by the tomboyish hairstyle (which was not of my choosing), but how cute do I look with it anyway? And how light my hair is!

One of my aunts was responsible for that haircut. I recall being furious once when mistaken for a boy by a lifeguard at a local swimming pool. He called out, ‘No running, little boy!’ and indignant, I yelled back, ‘I’m not a boy!’ Granted, I sported this hairstyle and I was running around in only bikini briefs … whoops. I don’t know what my sisters were thinking, letting me do that. (No pictures exist of this incident, fortunately.) Although possibly my memory might be faulty – I might have also been wearing a t-shirt. I hope …

On this zoo outing I am wearing a grey and yellow Amigos t-shirt and mushroom-coloured shorts, with blue thongs or flip-flops. Rather unusual colours for children’s clothing, but perhaps this is the genesis of my liking for such subtle shades. I seem to be holding a soft-serve ice cream in my hand, and the bemused expression on my face makes me giggle.

My mum, sister Star in chinos and blue tee, and cousin Mimi in dark jeans and what looks like a paisley shirt also feature in this series, as well as a pair of headless emus. Star and Mimi are both wearing Roman-style sandals. I was considered too little to go on the faster merry-go-round, and recall feeling envious of them. They look like they are astride greyhounds (or are they wild boars?), and I must say, if more sedate, at least my carousel horse is much more aesthetically appealing.

The Most Beautiful Coat in the World

A Fashion Emergency

Late last Wednesday evening on my commute home, a sartorial tragedy occurred. The last closure on my vintage 70s suede and rabbit fur coat tore from its moorings. Devastated, but preserving a remarkably calm front in the freezing conditions of a Melbourne winter’s night, I examined the mutilated coat. My knees would be cold on the way home, but the damage could be repaired. I breathed a sigh of relief.

The next evening I assembled the tools I would require in the reparation of this fashion emergency: needle, thread, scissors … and a pair of tweezers to retrieve the recalcitrant strip of leather that kept trying to escape its foundations even as it was being sewn back into place.

Fortunately I was able to access the reverse side of the leather as the lining (painstakingly replaced my lovely and charming adored sister Blossom several years ago as a birthday present pour moi) was left open at the base. Let me state at the outset: I am not a seamstress. I loathe needles and thread, and only reluctantly assume the rôle of mender when it is thrust upon me in direst circumstance.

The needle is not made for sewing leather. It’s tough to push through the hide, and my fingers hurt. Bits of fur are caught up in the slit. The tab keeps slipping from my grasp. But intrepidly, I sew on until I am finished. My repair is rudimentary and would probably amuse said lovely sister, but no one will ever see it as it’s on the inside of the coat (ahem). I give the closure a tug, and the stitching is firm.

a stitch in time saves nine and all that jazz …

And voila! The coat is repaired and fit for a princess to wear! In passing I notice that the closure above is loose by a few threads and ought to be reattached (a stitch in time saves nine and all that jazz), but one fit of industry is certainly enough for a single evening and was exhausting for my nerves besides. I must rest from my labours.

It was all worth it though. This coat is unutterably fabulous, and friends and strangers in the street constantly accost me to exclaim and marvel and pat me. I fear however, that it is one of those infamous garments that wears me, rather than the other way around. But I don’t care, I’m persuaded it’s the most beautiful coat in the world and I will love it forever. Or until it falls completely apart.

Sweet Treats

Here a pair of sweet, candy-coloured enamel pendants strung on gold chains, both of which I bought on eBay. Hot air balloons and carousel horses are two favourite motifs of mine, perhaps because they are nostalgic remnants of a more romantic era than our present one, or somehow they represent the freedom of childhood when life is one endless whirl of fun and unaccountability (for the lucky ones amongst us).

The sugar-coated brightness of the enamel and the twinkling rhinestones make these pendants look like sweets. They’re charming costume pieces perfect for an outing to a fairground by the beach, to be worn while eating toffee apples and cotton candy – although I guess I’ll have to wait til summer for that. Meanwhile I can daydream.